Do you get spam calls that claim to be from law enforcement agencies or social security, threatening to put you in jail? The best thing you can do for your fellow human is to keep those idiots on the line as long as you can. Pretend to be elderly and a
Like humanity was starting to roll off the assembly line and all of a sudden an angel rushes in and says oh wait wait stop, we forgot this!
and the line supervisors are like we forgot what?
This, this… this molecule. They need it. Some of them will
Don’t believe anyone who tells you that they’re right and smarter people with more education are wrong. Especially if they say god told them so.
Don’t believe anyone who tells you that a whole lot of other people believe them,
Someone needs to draft a rational workplace drug policy that companies can use
rather than the current drug policy typical of most workplaces, which is the equivalent of "abstinence only",
I propose a workplace drug policy that encourages full
- radical exclusion
- taking
- debriding
- radical owner reliance
- radical midnight howling
- no effort
- no responsibility
- leaving no objects on horizontal surfaces
- sitting in every box
- immediate scratching and cuddling
let us retract the foreskin of ignorance and apply the wire brush of enlightenment.
Did you know there is a way to measure gravity directly?
A way to prove, by experiment, that objects are attracted to one another proportional to their mass and the
I'll be going off to burning man in a few days, and I'm realizing that I'll actually have not one but two physical copies with me of almost every digital file that really matters to me, plus multiple copies in the cloud. Like my real
Element 115 was recently confirmed. The temporary name it has had for years has been Ununpentium, or eka-Bismuth. Now that it's confirmed, it needs a real name. Recent elements have been named after the country or laboratory that the element was
As I look through my personal sample of friends, it's hard for me to really identify anyone who "has a job," who has anything approaching the level of stability and security that was expected in generations gone by. Admittedly, my sample skews
I won’t sugarcoat this with self-righteousness: my primary reasons for finding myself carless are financial, nothing more.
But at the same time, wheels have NEVER been a priority for me. If they were, I’d likely live in a smaller apartment
It is almost impossible to fuck up butter and sugar
I started from a recipe I found online, but ended up changing it - most notably using butter instead of canola oil, and doubling the recipe so as to use up a whole
The thought came about because I ate at McDonald’s today. I eat a lot of fast food, but I usually don’t eat at McD’s very often, unless I need to eat while I’m driving. I avoid it partly because of a
In 2002, when I was getting laid off from Nokia, I proposed an idea for a service that, in some ways, resembles what Facebook is today, especially after the latest redesign.
I’m not pretending I
So, I got my car fixed – heater core, some sort of hose, the radiator too I think, plus a serpentine belt and one or two minor other issues. I picked it up, and it was purring like a kitten, except for one thing: “SERVICE
I need to start this off by saying that I did, in fact, vote against Proposition 8. A great many of my friends are gay, I support them with all of my heart, and fully understand why this means so much to them. But I
I am not a scientologist.
Let’s begin there.
I have never given money to the Church of Scientology, nor do I intend to.
I can believe that a second-rate science fiction writer with a checkered past could come up with something useful. L. Ron
In this old blog post, I worked out how to write a computer program to find five words of five letters using 25 different letters of the alphabet.
there is no solution to this problem, but I discovered "blacksmith gunpowdery", which
People ask me to explain things to them sometimes, and so I do. My friend Felicity asked:
So i’ve been researching North Korea lately, and trying to learn stuff. I never really did understand communism…i mean i understand the idea of it…but it
a friend asked in his blog:
what part of speech are you? are you a noun? are you a verb? are you a direct object?
I replied
you is a pronoun
i am an exclamation!
you are a dufus
Burning Man is the most beautiful thing ever made by the hand of man
I have spent the last week in a place of indescribable joy
It is the sum total of human kindness and good in pi square miles
It is every dream you have ever had,
As a Los Angeles resident, I am bombarded daily by the news of demonstrations in support of amnesty for Mexican immigrants. For example, just last month one protest resulted in students flying the Mexican flag above an inverted American flag.
Not so long ago, I saw a movie called Fuckland. It is the eighth film shot in the realistic, if stifling technique known as Dogme 95, pioneered by Lars von Trier. The story concerns Fabián, a callous Argentine,
I wrote this in 2006. Today, we call this an iPad.
I am a hardcore Apple devotee. However, I haven’t really owned a Mac laptop in years. The last laptop I’ve used on a regular basis is an aging Fujitsu beater I picked up on eBay for $250, under
I kinda feel bad about this one. I spent some time tonight playing mind games with a 419 scammer in Benin (location confirmed by my site logs)
1:17:54 AM mrstheresacolmbo0: COTONOU BENIN
1:17:58 AM mrstheresacolmbo0: REP
1:18:14 AM stephan: Good, you
She was lopsided, in a tangible way, hips and ribs sprawled akimbo at odd angles.
Her confident manner and balanced allure charmed all she met with the sense that moonlight was right around the corner.
From the first moment, I knew that she had
i want to use lye for shaving cream
rasp dense fibers from my chin
stab neon tubes into my jaw
until you see within
i want to scrape my scalp to patches
floss my teeth with wire
sew-in contacts cool clear shards
sell my skin to any buyer
pluck
and what of the danish, whose branches grow in layers of honey and lard and passionate expressions of anger? what of its flaky crust, its need to inhabit the bottom shelf of the carbohydrate rack at the convenience store, its gummy
We define ourselves by what we consume, and why not? Animals, for example, take their natural place as herbivores, carnivores, photovores and omnivores. It seems the most natural means of auto comprehension.
It has become evident, however, that
I am a libertarian. For all of its faults, I am certain that unfettered free market capitalism is the most effective way to manage our society. For this reason, I have generally considered myself a weak Republican. Admittedly a dope-smoking,
I lived in Tampere, Finland from 2/99-8/01
I can fool Finns into thinking I am a Finnish native for 5 or 10 minutes at a time, as long as they are drunk and we are in a loud bar and I stick mostly to their non-glossed utterances
It would have to be winter of 1988, early 1988, like January or something. I’m not sure, but my memories are tied to two xmas presents I got then:
- the CD of Depeche Mode: Music for the Masses, specifically Never Let Me Down Again (released 1987)
- The
I do not like synthetic smells.
Well, that’s not an absolute, I wear cologne sometimes, and don’t mind the right fragrance on the right woman – I tend to be a fan of Angel, both for women and men. And of course, I wear deodorant…
More often, though, it seems
All gambling is, at its heart, an act of worship.
I first became aware of this in my first real gambling experience. I was going to a trade show in Las Vegas, and my dad gave me $100 with explicit instructions on specifically what sort of machines to
I’ve been meaning to write this rather heavy entry for a while, something today made it somewhat more immediate. Perhaps this is an experience exclusive to my circle of friends and family, or perhaps this is more
